Talking family finance: the key role of advisers

The key role advisers play in navigating intergenerational financial conversations

Published: 17 May 2026 5 mins read

Advisers can play a critical role in bringing families together and facilitating productive discussions about long-term financial planning, according to Greg B Davies, an expert in investor psychology and Head of Behavioural Finance at the behavioural fintech Oxford Risk.

Greg recently outlined to Aviva the psychological issues that influence intergenerational financial decision-making.

Survey after survey shows that the British do not like talking about money. Indeed, only the Japanese are worse worldwide¹. There are lots of reasons for this reticence including shame, embarrassment and not wanting to burden others^2.

Moreover, says Greg, “Money carries emotional labels. A pound earned feels very different from a pound gifted — and that difference often sits at the heart of family finance conversations. Recognising that each generation attaches different meanings to money helps conversations flow more smoothly.”

Avoiding the subject

Attitudes towards the use of money certainly vary widely even between the closest knit of relationships, as Greg explains:

“Some people spend freely, others are extremely cautious. There is even a psychological scale for this: the spendthrift-tightwad spectrum. Differences can show up in couples and across generations, and it’s no surprise that conversations about money can quickly turn tense — so many people avoid them altogether.”

Mind the Generational Gap

Conflict between the generations is also common. Around one-third of baby boomers, for example, who may have experienced rationing in their youth, are reluctant to pass on their wealth to someone with a different attitude to money³.

Meanwhile, “children who are struggling to get on the housing ladder while their parents live in a large home that’s too big for them and is worth a lot of money, may also feel resentful,” points out Greg.

Yet simply handing over cash to the young could sap their willingness to study hard and build careers or businesses.

Timing the sweet spot

Greg believes gifts should ideally help younger people build a secure platform for the future – funding education, a first home, or insurance, rather than simply enabling more spending. The timing of a gift can also prove problematic. Handing over cash to immature adults who spend impulsively holds obvious dangers, but delaying the gift until they’re too old to make the most of them can also hold them back unnecessarily.

How advisers can help bring families together

Greg believes advisers can play a crucial role in defusing any generational disharmony. By bringing the family together around a table for an open conversation about subjects such as equity release, inheritance planning, annuities and protection products, issues can be aired. But Greg advises a ‘softly, softly’ approach.

“Advisers can play a valuable mediating role, but it’s best to begin with individual conversations. That way you can uncover what matters most to each person — and identify any emotional triggers to approach with care.”

Greg adds that Oxford Risk has in the past deployed psychometric financial personality assessments to profile family members and establish where they share perspectives or have very different preferences or attitudes. Or an adviser could develop their own questions to explore these differences.

“Gather the family together and show them the different answers they have given to the same questions. Talk through the issues gently, giving everyone space to express their views. That encourages an objective understanding of the issues at stake, and helps the generations plan the best collective way forward.”

Very wealthy families often create a written document that describes how decisions will be made. That is probably excessive for most families, says Greg, but writing down points of agreement is an excellent idea:

“It doesn’t need legal force — the act of writing itself can clarify thinking. If you can’t easily put an idea into words, maybe it isn’t a good one – and helps avoid misunderstandings years down the line. People’s memories of a conversation from years ago can differ — writing things down helps avoid misunderstandings later.”

Overall, a family conference with an adviser can be a good way of bringing people together to agree a long-term financial plan. But laying the groundwork is vital, because simply putting different generations together in a room without any initial research and discussions can prove counterproductive: “Without preparation, people either clam up or blow up — and neither leads to progress,” concludes Greg.

Sources

Recognising that each generation attaches different meanings to money helps conversations flow more smoothly

Dr. Greg Davies, Head of Behavioural Finance, Oxford Risk, Oxford Risk